Dude, Where's My Calm?

I am beginning to realise that I've been in a rather peculiar frame of mind for the last few weeks - for most of the last two months, really. My normal state of Zen calm, go-with-the-flow-ness, has been shallower than usual, such that it's taken far less than usual to stir me up, particularly to annoy me. Small things, which I'd ordinarily take in my stride, have been getting my goat in an unprecedented way. Badly phrased emails, poor grammar, pubs not stocking Erdinger even when they've signs out for it, the existence of right-wingers, the usual level of background idiocy that humanity provides, a missed train, have all been making me grind my teeth and just barely hold on to my calm.

This evening I sat down - after coming home and sleeping for a while - to eat, read a few graphic novels I haven't read in a while, and listen to Kerrang! for a bit. Except Kerrang! now has ads, which loses them this watcher, and, you guessed it, pisses me off no end. I have this new science-fiction universe trying to get out of my head, except that every time I get near being able to write something down, something else irritates me. I spend all my time calming down, and none being calm. I nearly broke out of it about two weeks ago, could feel things settling in my mind, and then it just sort of evaporated again.

This probably isn't evident to most people around me, I know; it hasn't been properly evident to me until this evening, but it is there. I just don't know why, and, yeah, that annoys me too.

Dude, Where's My Calm?

Originally published at Now Is A Long Time Too. You can comment here or there.

I am beginning to realise that I've been in a rather peculiar frame of mind for the last few weeks - for most of the last two months, really. My normal state of Zen calm, go-with-the-flow-ness, has been shallower than usual, such that it's taken far less than usual to stir me up, particularly to annoy me. Small things, which I'd ordinarily take in my stride, have been getting my goat in an unprecedented way. Badly phrased emails, poor grammar, pubs not stocking Erdinger even when they've signs out for it, the existence of right-wingers, the usual level of background idiocy that humanity provides, a missed train, have all been making me grind my teeth and just barely hold on to my calm.

This evening I sat down - after coming home and sleeping for a while - to eat, read a few graphic novels I haven't read in a while, and listen to Kerrang! for a bit. Except Kerrang! now has ads, which loses them this watcher, and, you guessed it, pisses me off no end. I have this new science-fiction universe trying to get out of my head, except that every time I get near being able to write something down, something else irritates me. I spend all my time calming down, and none being calm. I nearly broke out of it about two weeks ago, could feel things settling in my mind, and then it just sort of evaporated again.

This probably isn't evident to most people around me, I know; it hasn't been properly evident to me until this evening, but it is there. I just don't know why, and, yeah, that annoys me too.